A Letter To Myself

Dear Friend,

      It has been a long time since I have seen you. Where have you been hiding yourself?Are you still there somewhere?I remember a time when you were all smiles and jokes and a lot of fun to be around.An endless ball of energy where nothing you could not do or accomplish.There wasn’t anything you wouldn’t try,and the world was just a step away just waiting for you to reach out and grab it.Grab it you did often.

    When I looked at you,your eyes smiled as if it knew a joke that no one else knew or could hear.When I look at you now all I see are the dull glare of someone beaten by too many battles lost.Your smile was warm and it was the kind that welcomed a stranger into your space.It made them want to know you better.Where did it go?

    Had the pain of body and spirit beaten you into submission of any other person that you once felt sorry for.That you had broken your neck to let them know that the world had so much to offer them so you befriended them to show them the light.Has your light disappeared into darkness?Was it the many pills you now have to take to stay functioning cause you to disappear?Where my friend once stood now a stranger stands.Who are you?You look familiar somehow but I don’t know.

    The YOU I once knew had so much love to give everyone you met,but now you can’t even love yourself.You were bigger then life and anyone that met you knew it instantly.It showed in everything you did and just in the aura you put out.Why are you letting Fibromyalgia(the meds and pain that it causes),the kids,life (and it’s stresses),and the depression of it all beaten you? You were unstoppable before and NOTHING stopped you EVER. The harder something was, the more determined you was to beat it.Have you given up the fight?

      You know the fight is still worth it!Life is still worth it!You just have to fight harder even on days you can’t.You still have to reach out to the world and grab what it has to offer.It’s still there waiting for you however your approach may have to be different.You can still have your hopes and dreams although you may have to adjust them a little…….you can still have them.It may just be a little bit harder to reach,but you can do it!!!!!

    I know it all seems hopeless right now, but give it time.Do the best you can with what you have.I promise it will get better. Who knows maybe one day your physical pain might even become a bad memory of what was………you never know it could happen………if given enough time.Show yourself the patience you show everyone else you know.

             you will be OK,

                        Michele aka Micki


~ by welcometomyworld on October 2, 2006.

2 Responses to “A Letter To Myself”

  1. This too shall pass, and we will see the new and improved Micki! It WILL be ok…..


  2. I know it will.The rules to my Game of Life have just changed a bit over the last few years…..Still getting use to and accepting it….accepting it is the hard part but is slowly coming around to where it should be.I wanted to thank you from every inch of my heart for being who you are and accepting me whatever way I come…You are truly a gem in the rough…..Getting to know you is one of the most possitive things to come out of those years…I feel blessed that you walking into my doorstep.Be blessed as you have blessed me. 😀

    hugs love and kisses always my friend, micki

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